Thursday, November 12, 2015

Fires Which Burn Brightly..

I have been quite emotional and stressed for a while. There are things that are happening at a supersonic speed and I am just trying to make sense of them. Slowly and Steadily.
I will share everything here. I will write my story. A chapter at a time. I will piece this puzzle together for you but at my own pace. So stay here, read my thoughts, read my story and wish me luck. I am going through some major changes and god knows that I need those wishes. For now, I will talk about my favoritest festival. The brightest and the largest festival.

This year I was at home for Diwali. Something that I haven't just done enough. All four of us at home, decorating, chai sessions, chit-chatting, checking out vintage items in the closet, clicking pictures, attending phone calls in between, talking, more talking, sibling fights, reading, special home cooked food. We turned down Diwali party invitations that we were invited to. It was good to be home.

One thing that I noticed during Diwali was an increase in my Whatsapp Diwali messages.
Most of those messages were as fake as Facebook likes. What I don't understand is why message someone Happy Diwali out of compulsion.Why wish happy and prosperous Diwali when you clearly don't mean well. Why write such messages when you have documented your bitterness everywhere possible? Maybe because the number exists for no apparent reason and it is just too convenient to broadcast one message to all.  Anyway, I wished the ones I wanted to and I know who all had taken a moment to think, write or call to wish. That's all that matters, I think.

The thing that I am really disgusted with is the need to burn crackers. I am generally a no-cracker Diwali person and don't encourage pataka tamasha. This year I was ultra sensitive about it. The smog level in the city is growing at an alarming rate. I realize this every day, every time when I step outside the house for a run. I have spent nights coughing because of respiratory allergies. There's added noise pollution. Why do we need to carry on with this age-old tradition. Why can't we be more sensitive towards our surroundings. Why can't we find other ways to celebrate the occasion. You can't call yourself eco-friendly if you are burning crackers. Pets suffer more as they have more sensitive sense of hearing. What's the point in being modern-forward-thinking individual when you can't change your traditions to suit the present day reality.

Something's gotta change. Somethings gotta give. 

I stepped outside the house with my sister to run errands when I noticed some pretty decorations and lights. They looked so beautiful and it reminded me of my existence and the fact hat I am a part of this big crazy universe. I matter. I am not sure how this realization came to me or why I thought of it but I began documenting my thoughts. I had this Deja Vu feeling which led to some frantic searches on this blog and guess what? I had written about it sometime back - Here it is 


Edited to add: The title is a beautiful song by Procol Harum.
Beautiful lyrics and somehow they make sense to me..

This war we are waging is already lost
The cause for the fighting has long been a ghost
Malice and habit have now won the day
The honours we fought for are lost in the fray

Standards and bugles are trod in the dust
Wounds have burst open, and corridors rust
Once proud and truthful, now humbled and bent
Fires which burnt brightly, now energies spent

Let down the curtain, and exit the play
The crowds have gone home and the cast sailed away
Our flowers and feathers as scarring as weapons
Our poems and letters have turned to deceptions


  1. I love the title of your post . So apt .

    I love Diwali, I love lighting my house , with loads of diyas . I was in delhi last week and that Smog was really bad, I wonder how it is now after all the crackers.

    And whatever is happening on personal front , Just hang in there , It will be fine :)

  2. Love the title. Curious to know what is going on with you. So glad you had a lovely Diwali.

    I am all for Civic duties. Care for the environment. I am not a crackers kind of person either. However the pollution in Delhi is multifactorial and a lot more needs to be done than stop everyone from burning fireworks one day of the year. I am sure it will help, but my point is that it won't be enough.

  3. @Sonal: It is a beautiful song by this band - Procol Harum. Give it a try..
    It has become quite bad in a span of 2 days..
    Thanks for being there!

    @det-res: Its a song and a beautiful one.
    I completely agree on the point that it is multifactorial and yes we need to do something to save this city.
    My anger was directed more towards those who cry ecofriendly all the time and then burst crackers..
    And c'mon you know whats happening! Unnecessary stress mostly.